Life is Tough

So today started off as any other normal day. Got to work. Closing shift, AGAIN. FML right? Anyway. Get there and there is a beautiful note about how my last close job sucked and I need to do my job better. HA okay whatever. Maybe I should write you  notes about how you need to do YOUR job better. Manager from hell. So la di dah close and make a measly $20 in tips :( this just keeps getting better and better.


Then I head over to my boyfriens house. We were supposed to work out but he lost his running shoes. GO FIGURE. So its time for me to leave and we have a huge crying session again, considering my move in day is in exactly a month. Things involved in the crying session. 1. He isnt going to school with me next year. 2. I will be paying $500 dollars a month to people while in school. 3. He moved to Spokane. 


Lets address #1. So my bf told me the other day he didnt want to go to school in montana next year with me. And so I ask him why and he says "i feel like it is just a bad idea for me. Like I get a bad feeling about it." I am just sitting there trying to decipher what he means by this.  I dont get it. I feel like if he really loved me he would do anything to stay with me and be with me. And what is this bad feeling he has?? Does he think we wont work out? That we will end up breaking up? This kid is like a lead box and Im a cell phone trying to get service, I got nothing. I am trying to be strong but every time I think about leaving its just so hard, sometimes I dont even want to go. And NO my bf is not the only reason why. Which leads to..


#2. $500 a month I have to pay to different things while attending school, working, and trying to maintain a high GPA so I can even get into Pharmacy school! Ugh, sound like a lot on my plate? YA it IS. Lets break down this $500 a month in debt. $190 goes to my bank for my car loan. $100 goes to my parents for loaning me the extra money for the deficit my bank had involving the car loan. I only owe them 8 months of this so I have about 6 to go because they did defer a few months of payment for various reasons. And then about $190 again goes to my student loan payment. This one really pisses me off. The government decided that my parents make so much money a year that they can afford to spend $35000 extra dollars a year on my college education. And that they are so freaking rich that they can start affording the payments right away. Irritating in the most possible way is that my parents are NOT actually paying for it, I am. So screw you government. Honestly, I really think there should be a questionnaire involved with the FAFSA. Because since I am paying for this I should really be the one whos finances are considered and NOT my parents. 


3. My boyfriend moved to Spokane. Yes back to good ol Cody. HE used to live like 10 min away from me and just recently moved to Spokane. I feel like this put unnecessary stress on our relationship before it was really due. Like why couldn't he wait one more month to move rather than jump the gun and move all the sudden. Just another way to break my heart.